Doing what we are taught to do

For years, I did what most women are taught to do.

I showed up for my annual OB GYN appointments. Pap smear. Routine questions. Brief reassurance that everything looked fine. I trusted that if something important was happening in my body, someone would name it.

And yet, my body was changing.

Not in one dramatic way, but in subtle, persistent ways that were hard to describe. My energy felt different. Sleep became less predictable. My nervous system felt more reactive. There were shifts I noticed, but they did not arrive neatly packaged or easy to explain.

No one mentioned perimenopause.

The silence that delays understanding

At the time, I did not question it. Like many women, I assumed midlife changes would be addressed when relevant. I assumed education would be offered when it mattered.

That assumption delayed understanding.

It was not until I began seeking treatment for an autoimmune condition that things started to come into focus. As I paid closer attention to my symptoms, I began to recognize patterns that could no longer be ignored. My experiences were not isolated. They were connected.

That was when I began to understand the role my reproductive hormones were playing beyond my cycle.

When theory meets lived experience

Even with my clinical training, I did not immediately grasp the full interconnectedness of what was happening. I understood hormones in theory. I had studied physiology. But living inside a body where reproductive hormones were influencing metabolism, nervous system regulation, immune response, and stress tolerance was different.

That realization marked a turning point.

I began learning my body in a more intentional way and allowing it to inform how I lived. I adjusted my schedule to align with my menstrual cycle and started using patterns in my mood as meaningful data, signals that reflected my lived experience rather than something to push through or ignore.

This was no longer abstract. It was personal.

Seeing the body as a system

I began to see how hormonal shifts could amplify inflammation. How stress responses became harder to regulate. How metabolic changes were intertwined with sleep and mood. How immune flares were not random, but responsive to broader shifts happening in my body.

And I began asking a deeper question.

If it required this level of awareness, persistence, and curiosity for me to connect these dots, what happens to women without clinical training, without access to resources, without the language to describe what they are experiencing?

Where the healthcare system falls short

The current healthcare system is not designed to teach women how their bodies work across systems. It is rooted in secondary prevention. Treat the symptom. Manage the disease. Move on.

What it does not prioritize is health literacy.

Women are expected to notice symptoms, track changes, and communicate clearly during brief appointments. Yet very few are taught how reproductive hormones influence the brain, metabolism, immune function, or long term health. The responsibility is placed on the woman, without the education to support that expectation.

This creates a quiet disadvantage, especially in midlife.

Why this work exists

Perimenopause is not simply a reproductive transition. It is a whole body transition. When it goes unnamed, women are left questioning themselves, normalizing discomfort, or seeking care that never addresses the full picture.

This is why I created My Sister’s Advocate.

Not because women are failing to advocate, but because the urgency has changed. Learning your body, understanding patterns, and participating confidently in shared decision making is essential to navigating midlife and aging well.

From fear to fluency

This work is not about fear. It is about fluency.

When women understand how their bodies communicate, they stop apologizing for symptoms. They ask better questions. They recognize connections instead of isolated issues. They move through healthcare as informed partners rather than passive recipients.

If any part of this feels familiar, know this.

You are not imagining it.
And you are not behind.

You are being invited into a deeper relationship with your body.

And that relationship begins with understanding.